I am waiting to hear. Did I really hear the nurse say,”Its a baby boy..”. I knew that I had a new companion in our life. One that we would share our lives with. The first cry, he has communicated that I have come to this world, crying is the first sound the baby makes when he enters this world, which is a very positive sign of a new healthy life.
Imagine you are understanding it all alone. To father a child means to give a child life. There is not much more serious than this, however a father can impart many more gifts than this if he can be a good father. He is teaching me those gifts.
I owe this lesson to my father.
The importance of engaging fathers from the very early stages of a baby’s life onward cannot be underestimated.
As a father I saw my kid grow, from a day old to today. Every week I see him grow. The ensuing weeks after a baby’s birth is when the bond between parent and child begins to form.
At this stage, what can be the first step in a life-long relationship from which he can feel secure and positive outcomes can result.
In my darkest moment — a week after my son, was born and 12 hours after he was first admitted to the ICU, after having turned yellow in my arms — I sat down on the hospital bench with my wife, Swee. We spent the whole night waiting outside the ICU. He was smiling, beautifully. His eyes were covered with a photo sensitive eye wear, I remember Swee was crying, her mother was praying, and I was feeling utterly, simply helpless. In the ICU, he was accompanied by many other new born kids. One child had tried several medications to treat his condition, but nothing was easing him. He was born before the 9th month, I saw the kid’s mother worried and tired. Swee shared a few moments with her. Sharing! It is a rare human feeling….
Nature nourishes everything gradually but constantly. Waiting is necessary. Patience to wait for the right moment. “Never react, you will only respond”. Some waiting are essential. First wait was for the birth, this one was for his recovery.
During the wait, I will torture with thoughts. Weaving stories. What will happen if he … hmmm. But as time passes and life unfolds its beauty, we have more reasons to celebrate than to worry.
How do parents make face such happenings with a question mark as big as this? Its a lesson to be learnt. Some couples are lucky to have their parents to take care, more importantly pass information that is necessary for the survival of the new born. Those who are left alone struggle, scour for valuable tips.
We learnt that exposing the kid to Sun in the morning during the first weeks of his life is life saving. Reason is that UV rays make the billirubin on the skin surface water soluble and pass it through urine. A newborn baby’s liver does not have the capacity to break the billirubin, resulting in coloring of the skin from face to body downwards.
……… Just one of the things learnt, there is a plenty to share that the little man teaches us. After all as wordsworth puts it, a child is the father of a man.
I understood a mother’s love after seeing Swee wrap the kid with a rare possessiveness. Mother’s love. She begged the GODs, she was humble to the care takers. She is watching his milestones in growth.
Today he was 3 months old, I could hear him shout for a minute or two. He is discovering that not only can he make different sounds , but he can turn up the volume as well. Let me record it ………………………….
- What I’m Thankful For – An A-Z list of parenting gratitude (babble.com)
- Having a Baby After SIDS – Pregnancy after the loss of a child (babble.com)
- Who’s Your Daddy? – Why women don’t reveal their kids’ paternity (babble.com)